Matthews Blog

2011-07-02T23:25:00.000-07:00

....

OMF'NG

2011-06-17T21:51:00.000-07:00

trying to setup up my blog to start blogging again and everything is going wrong. and now its time to go to bed. i dont know how to express my anger at such a trivial thing. good night.

HILARIUOS

2008-12-22T21:07:00.001-08:00

I just found the best video EVER!!!!!!

Watch Video

Check volume first.... death metal.

looking back

2008-12-16T18:34:00.000-08:00

was just looking back through the blog and I'd have to say that I let mom convince me to do this thing. Was nice to have all those thing written down to remind me of all that has happened, especially in the points that memory fails me.

Mind you I've also been looking back through my journal as well and I feel the same about that as well. I'm glad to have things written down so that I don`t forget them. I don't recall who or how I was convinced to write a journal but I`m glad I started it.

A lot of things dissapear from the memory after a while, and I`m glad to have a record of it so that I can remember my life even when I forget. So thank you Mom for getting me going on the blog and thank you to whomever or whatever got me going on a journal.

On a happier note we got the rats a new cage. It`s a huge rabbit cage. Bree`s mom bought it for us and we are really thankful, the girls seem so much happier with it. Theres so much room and three seperate levels.

I was going to post some pics of it but googles not letting me right now for some reason, i think it may be my router. Routers been giving me some grief for the past few days. I`m not sure whats wrong with it but its randomly dropping my internet and I have to restart the modem and router. Oh well. I`m sure I`ll figure it out, I`m a smart cookie.

TTYL

Christmas

2008-12-15T10:32:00.000-08:00

Well my christmas tree and lights are up now. then again my lights are always up lol.

teehee cats

2008-12-14T14:03:00.000-08:00

OK so last night Bree's cat Boo ate Bree's homework. I wasn't quick enough to get a pic of her actually doing it but i did get some before and after pics as proof

Before the act

After the crime

The remainder of the homework

Decided

2008-12-08T18:18:00.000-08:00

I have decided to switch completely over to Ubuntu. I've been using it for the past while now and I really prefer it over windows. It's really easy to use once you've learned where everything is and how everything works. I can do anything on it that I could do on windows.

Life-wise, nothing much going on. I've had one call from Kamloops about a job interview from a company called Convergy's. They are a lot like Stream in Chilliwack. So I know I can get the job really easily but I also know that I wont last long at it. Hopefully I can last long enough though that I can get a job at one of the paint stores out in Kamloops once the busy season starts up again.

I dont know why but I really enjoy working at paint stores. I think I enjoy it because theres always something new going on, no two customers are the same. Also the same reason I cant stay at call centers very long, too dang tedius. Same thing over and over and over and over. lol

Well I hope it works out, but for now.... ttyl

By Now....

2008-12-04T20:21:00.000-08:00

by now most may kno that me and Bree have split up. As far as break ups go, it was a good one. We cried and now we're alright. we're staying friends thankfully. I dont know what else to say about it really.

I am currently looking for work and a place to live in Kamloops. I've been very homesick for quite a while now and between bree and the possibility of losing my job, I'm taking the opportunity to go home. I'll miss you all of course but i need to do what i need to do. I'm almost possitive that I'll still be here thru xmas, so dont change any plans.

other then that not a lot has been going on. my job as i said has become a little unstable. we are moving 3 stores into one and with that comes about 15ish staff members. boss only needs about 4 or 5 staff... so I'm a little worried about my position.

um .... yup thats it for now. ttyl

Friday Pic Madness

2008-11-22T19:10:00.000-08:00

My mother http://purpledragonfly.playaparadise.com/ had a great idea, Sharing unused pics on friday to get to kno each other better... i like the idea and will be doing the same. however i need to start taking pics...... I'm on it

2008-11-21T06:37:00.001-08:00

So I thought I'd elaborate on how things are going since I barely touched on it last post. Bree and I are doing really well for right now. We're both still very much in love with each other. Her job is treating her good, she is the assistant supervisor at Watcom Wine and Spirits. My job at ICI Paints is going well.

We will be moving sometime near March as we have gotten ourselves a brand new condo. The place is very nice. It's a one bedroom condo with in suite laundry, dishwasher, garberator, two underground parking stalls, and a fireplace.

We are currently having a flee problem with our cats. I wish the landlady had told me before I moved in that this has been a problem in the past and keeps coming back. Flees are such a pain to try and get rid especially since our whole floor is infested with them.

I have finally put on some weight. I'm sitting at 165 at the moment. Which is awesome because I have not been able to get past 145 since grade seven. My tendinitis in my shoulder seems to have finally let up and I'm feeling like a normal human being again. Also been trying to exercise to get my strength back from the shoulder problem, as it has left me quite physically weak.

Not much else to say right now. I'm quite sure I'll see you all at the Christmas dinner and I'll have to say all that again quite a few times... lol. See you all soon.

Adversity

2008-11-19T20:44:00.000-08:00

What makes us stand up to the face of adversity? Is it the challenge of life or the fear of losing something we most cherish? Do we stand up to adversity for personal gain or perhaps personal loss? What about religious, philosophical, or spiritual beliefs and / or needs? Do we take a stand for the the things lost that may or may not return?

I do not know.

I stand against my adversaries of laziness, slothliness, foolishness, and solitude to gain back my energy, strength, cleanliness, intellect, and socialism. As for general adversity, I move on because i can and have to. I don't know why but I have to.... it feels like something is pulling at me.... maybe destiny.

/shrug

anyways.... life is good. moving into a new condo in march. later all

Lamonte

2008-08-19T10:25:00.000-07:00

I got another new cat the other day. His name is Lamonte. he's one of Bree's cats. He's about 16 years old and he is such an awesome cat. part blue russian and other half is mystery.

Other than that not too much happening over here. Job is going well. Bree's work is going well and her schooling is about to start up again. Busy busy Bree.... 2 jobs and school.

talk to ya all later

yay

2008-07-29T18:12:00.000-07:00

awesome! i got my blog back AND it seems to be in one piece. Going to be blogging again, well as much as i think about it anyway. Started a new job over at ICI paints. the pay is much better though the atmosphere isnt as good. but i should give it time. only been there a week and a half. so we'll see

anywhoo, got to go. movies to watch girlfriend to cuddle.

what a great day

2007-11-21T14:07:00.000-08:00

Me and Bree both have today off... so we are doing absolutely nothing and its GREAT. It's good to have these days every now and again. yesterday i did all my cleaning in my apartment and went shopping. It was good to get that all done and dealt with. i dont wanna go back to work tomorrow, this weekend has been awesome

anywhoo, back to doing nothing

ahh

2007-11-17T22:20:00.000-08:00

so nice to be home. was housesitting for my mom for the past 3 weeks and i am glad to finally be home... to finally sleep in my own bed, eat my own food, drink my own coffee.

just finished formatting my comp yet again.. i really wanna get a new one but i need my money. im spending more than im making at the moment.. so even though i got the money saved up i technically can not afford a new comp.

I still have not played WoW since i quit but i really want to. it's so hard not to.. its a GREAT game and its a GREAT way to socialize... i've met so many awesome ppl on WoW... oh well i guess i'll just have to meet ppl the old fashion way. lol

hehe

2007-11-09T11:02:00.000-08:00

so last night I got a haircut and then got my girlfriend to dye my hair for me. Apparently its a blueish black but all I've seen it as is black. i like it though. been wanting to do it for sometime now. I'm glad to have met Bree, she's really awesome and makes me so happy.

i need to take pics of things, like my new hair and apartment and bree. words are not enough on somethings.

bah im kinda bored at the moment... kinda rambling... l8rs

what a week

2007-11-08T17:02:00.000-08:00

What a crummy week... tendonitis is acting up pretty bad and work is chaotic right now. not really busy but theres a lot to do and now that the customer base has slowed down we can actuallly get it done so im the one that gets to do it, being the only guy in the department.

Oh well, life goes on. i just wish the pain would stop going on. other then that, not much happening, just relaxing with bree while house sitting for my ma. Cleaning her condo and my apartment this weekend... should get alot done this weekend.... though i should be relaxing the shoulder *sigh*

anywho im going to lay down for a bit... l8rs

Face book

2007-11-05T18:08:00.000-08:00

Wow facebook.com is AWESOME!!! i have reunited with friend that i thought i would never see again. this is great. though im still looking for 2 in particular but i need to give it time i spose... its awesome to talk to these ppl again

so

2007-11-03T10:37:00.000-07:00

so whats been happening in my life? well... I got sick of ignoring everything and cancelled my WoW subscription... got full time at home depot... quit the liquor store... moved back out on my own into a really nice one bedroom apartment... got a new girlfriend. her names bree and shes awesome. currently reformatting my computer again so I'm on Bree's laptop. Maybe be losing a few friends but im trying to get them back.

other then that i'd have to say not much is going on.

im back

2007-11-02T22:32:00.000-07:00

I have cancelled my WoW supscription and will be trying to keep this blog up to date. will post more later... just wanted to give you all a heads up

i wish.....

2007-10-17T17:05:00.001-07:00

things were easier

Updates

2007-07-24T14:59:00.000-07:00

noticed that its been a while since I last blogged so I'd thought that I'd update. Still working the two jobs. got all my bills paid off and got new glasses. still working on a new computer... mines starting to make odd noices that it really shouldnt be. oh well...one day.

Other then that I cant really think of to much else to put in.

2007-06-19T08:20:00.001-07:00

Well got the computer working properly again..... otherwise very little has been happening in my life.

GAHK

2007-06-14T16:00:00.000-07:00

Computer died.... again... did some windows updates and computer went down good and hard... lol. thats all

With Just A Glance

2007-06-06T23:54:00.000-07:00

The other day at home depot I had an experience that I just cant get out of my head. And it's been about a week since it happened. lol

I was helping a customer with paint rollers when out of the corner of my eye I see this girl walking up to me. She had to pass behind me and the customer I was helping. That alone was weird. When she passed behind me it was like I could feel her movements though we didnt touch and I couldnt see her.

The oddest thing though was yet to come. After she passed by me, I glanced back at her and she did the same thing. Our eyes met and it was like my gut dropped and the world literally stood still. It was like everything just stopped or dissapeard, no movement or noise. It was just me and her.

And then it was over... I have never felt anything like that before that day and I cant stop thinking of that experience or that girl. I haven't seen her since but I am keeping my eyes open for the girl who stopped my world with just a glance.

Other than that, life is going good. Working lot's and getting things paid off. Pretty soon I'm oing to be able to get my teeth done and start buying posessions and move out. I say soon but I'm thinking months. But it's going quicker then I thought possible. G'night all

Howdy

2007-05-28T18:16:00.000-07:00

So I've been keeping pretty busy. Been working the 2 jobs as well as playing a game called World of Warcraft. It's an online computer game that I'm really enjoying. I've taken mom's suggestion and setup a blog of my experiences which can be found here.

Other then that, not much happening, just working and playing my computer game when I can.

OH! I had a great B-day. Mom and Gregg made me a great steak dinner and we had a few drinks. Nothing fancy but it was one of the better B-days I've ever had. For presents I got my game from Mom and Gregg and a new car stereo from my dad. The stereo is really good. It will play any kind of cd, an mp3 player, and a memory card likethe kind in a camara.

And colby's graduation was pretty good too. We went to kamloops for that and had dinner at the greek restaraunt. I'm really happy for Colby that he managed to grad. I was worried about it. But he's showing that he has a good head on his shoulders after all. lol.

K I'm off now. later

soooo tired

2007-05-18T12:49:00.000-07:00

lol. so far I'm really tired with this 2 jobs but I'm not used to it. once I get used to it it shouldnt be to bad. I hope. Anyways got the rest of the day to myself so im going to relax.... l8r

alright

2007-05-16T23:57:00.000-07:00

Sooo i finally have 2 jobs. tomorrow starts my double shifting... work in the morning from 7-11 at Home depot then over to the liquor store for 400-1130. should be fun.. I'm just glad home depot is finally giving me hours.

gotta sleep. g'night

Stuff

2007-05-07T12:31:00.000-07:00

Well I have finally started to read the "Wheel of Time" series by Robert Jordan and so far it's prety darn good. So far it's a pretty good fantasy novel, very well written but I cringe at the thought that the series is at least 10 books long.

Work is going good. Been working full time at the Watcom Wine and Spirits. It's a pretty awesome and easy job. I also still have my full time job at Home Depot but they have not given me any hours yet after 3 weeks of full time employment. If something doesnt come of that im going to have to find another job. I wanna be working 2 jobs right now so that I can catch up on everything and start pulling ahead. oh tiredness.... lol.

As for my last post... I'm keeping my blog but am very dissapointed that only one person left a comment about it. I figured more people would be trying to keep me round but oh well, just proves my point that this blog isnt all that important.

anyway, l8r

hmm

2007-04-22T16:16:00.000-07:00

I'm getting rather board with blogging. I have nothing to ever really say of importance. I find that its mostly a spot for me to keep track of some links but now that I'm using google sync, I dont need the blog for my links.

aside from that, I got a jobe at home depot and am doing fine. want to move back out on my own but it takes time. trying to get someone to take ownership of my phone. It costs me too much money and the only way out of the contract is to buy it out (EXPENSIVE) or to have someone take over the phone contract.

anyway... I got nothing else so ttyl

Well thats a first

2007-04-17T14:44:00.000-07:00

So this is the first time in my life where I've been able to get 3 fulltime jobs that all pay 10.00 or more an hour. Walmart, Home Depot and a contractor thru the local employment center all want to hire me. It's a crazy workforce out there.. lol

Also a first for me, I've turned down a job! I have never done that I dont think. And I'm going to have to turn down another as well.... OH! I've got to cancel some interviews as well!! lol.

So anyway... not much else happening over here. l8r

The Car II

2007-04-12T08:55:00.000-07:00

So my Dad is a bit strange... he was looking for a new bumper and headlight for my car and he wound up buying a new 96 Geo Metro. It's two years older then mine and has about 7000 less km's on it but other then that its perfect.

So we got the new car through aircare and insured it and then swapped the good parts from the old metro to the new one... there was some minor interior damage and a stock stereo that had to go. lol.

The oddest thing about the car change is, once I had the new car the old car fell apart. The drivers door has just about fallen off. Previus owner mangled the door and now it has rusted almost off of the frame. There was other things as well, like mangled nuts and bolts in the front end. The bumper was far worst then I thought it was after my accident.... mind you it was worst then ICBC said it was as well.... hmmmm.... oh well.

On a different subject, I have had two interveiws so far this month, one at Walmart and the other for Shell. Neither job sounds very good but it would be nice to get one and get some money flowing again. Oh well whatever happens happens, right.

Also I have moved my family website to a Google server. I'm trying to make it more user friendly and prettier. I'm still getting it up and running properly but the website is http://mcheltman85.googlepages.com/home

Other then all that.... not much happening here. lol. ttyl

The Car

2007-04-05T17:58:00.000-07:00

I have a road test scheduled for the 4th of may and my little car may automatically fail me if I dont get her fixed up before hand. I was in a 3 car pile up a while back (no one was hurt) and there was enough damage to the car that the headlights were affected.... they're now stuck in high beam.

This is the car with all the damage... the hood is squished in... the driver light is broken and is just sitting there... and the bumper is busted up as well... hard to see all that in the pic but I assure you its there.. lol

So anyway... went to my dads yesterday and told him what was happening and then we went out to Pick a Part. :)

We hunted around for parts for my little metro as wel as a tailgate for his truck... didnt find either untill we were heading out. Then we spotted a 97 Pontiac Firefly and it was in almost perfect condition. So we ripped it apart lol. And now my car is part Metro and part Firefly lol.

Well some things got better and obviously some got worse as well but it will get there. The hood does not have a dent in it and we managed to push the bumper down so I can get the headlight fixed. I may need to get the window fixed as well but I'm going to check out icbc's site and see if it will be an issue with the road test.

I'll throw some more pics up once i get further on the repairs.... just hope it will be sooner rather than later. Tata for now.

tehehehe

2007-04-02T11:37:00.000-07:00

well im fully moved into mothers place. Finally back online and on day 2 of no smoking which is fustratingly nice. lol. just fixing up my puter right no so ttyl

movin update

2007-03-26T22:38:00.000-07:00

well im pretty much done moving just got to take the last few things over... and then im dun... yay. ill be glad when its dun and everything settles.

smoking-wise... im finaly down to the loest brand. next step is no more... should be easier now... i hope.

Well anyway... im tired and going to bed... goodnight

packing

2007-03-25T14:22:00.000-07:00

well packing is going good... not much left to do here. got a load rdy to go out to moms tonight for dinner. I'm going to be sad to leave this place... i liked it here. it might be a run down dump but the I still liked it here and the neighbours are great for the most part.

The smoking is going good... im almost down to the lightest brand and should be able to quit once im in at moms... at least thats the plan/goal.

but yeah not much left to do here or to pack... lol i love my car. can fit the world in my little car. anyone looking for a great cheap car.... get a metro. awesome feul consumption, surprisingly spacius, never lets me down even after a 3 car pile up lol. I love my metro.

Been learning a couple new songs for the guitaring... 'nothing else matters' by metalica, 'dee' by randy rhoades, and 'storybook love' by willy deville and mark knopfler. good songs... but the first 2 are freakin hard... lol

anyways i gotta get back to moving... later all

dangit

2007-03-24T20:22:00.000-07:00

I dont know why i keep bothering with this computer... formatted last night and the reinstall seems to have gone wrong... everytime i try to do anything my computer crashes. I'm sure i got faulty hardware somewhere but i dont know what. My thoughts on my problem is that im trying to use a very old tired computer and it wants to just roll over and die... lol. gotta keep pushing it though... cant afford a new one.

on a lighter note.. I think im just about done packing and my music collection is getting bigger. yes i may be downloading the music but I would buy it if i could. I would rather support these artists... but oh well i cant. weeellll i got nothing else right now.....

sigh

2007-03-24T10:49:00.000-07:00

well plans for today.... pack and clean... yay. I've got my bathroom all done and have been working on the main room now... but it's a big job since the main room is bedroom, kitchen,living room, and any other room you can think of.... (Batchelor suite) lol

Got today and tomorrow off though so I should be able to get most of it done... if not all of it.

well just a certain something for a certain friend of mine that i recently heard... this is how I think of you and I really appreciate having you as a friend even though i may not show it :)

Blood Brother by Manowar

When the world turns you away
A friend will not say no
There is strength that we all have
It's not the strength we show

And in your darkest hour
In your darkest nights
Whatever life will do
I am here for you

Think of me wherever you are
When it seems like you're reaching the end
Call on me, know in your heart
On one you can always depend I am thy friend

Though we're far away
The stars above are the same
And when you feel alone
There's one who shares your pain

A true friend has no price
There is none to pay
I remember you stood by me
I'm with you all the way

Think of me wherever you are
When it seems like you're reaching the end
Call on me, know in your heart
One who will always defend
I am thy friend

Just poppin in

2007-03-23T23:58:00.000-07:00

thought id pop in, see whats happening. lol. well today was kinda long. worked from 9-2 even though i wasnt scheduled to... been packing and cleaning the apartment.. had to format my computer again... been rebuilding my music collection...

anywhoo, i dont really have anything to say.. so bye

i dont know

2007-03-22T12:34:00.000-07:00

well not much happening on the homefront. arms feeling better or im not noticing as much... either way is good to me... lol. so it looks like my computer needs to be replaced... lol. it's been working better with the new memory but it still seems to be having problems, looks like the video card but im not sure. Phone has started to not work again. I'm pissed off but maybe telus will let me break the contract now at no cost to me... since its 2 phone that this has happened to.

also seems im going to be moving again at the end of the month... going back to moms for a stint... i cant do this alone at the moment. Move in with her and get the bills squared away and go to school... should be good.

anyway, im going to get going for work.. have a good day all

well

2007-03-06T10:38:00.000-08:00

here we go again... lol.... k so i wasnt able to update the bios.... the download is offline.... i switched back to my big hard drive as im sure thats not the problem. and am trying a certain combination of new ram that my dad bought me... so far its going pretty good... windows installed without any errors and i've been able to stay on for more then a few hours... I really hope I got it figured out... I hate being without my puter... it's my only entertainment, and communication, and .... well... its everything really. lol kinda sad but whatever..... anywhoo gots to get going to work here pretty soon... later

GRR

2007-03-05T21:01:00.000-08:00

well a different hard drive... new ram... new hard rive cable... and a few hours gone by.... Problems have already started again... so now im not sure whats wrong... i guess the processor or the motherboard or something more vital... maybe the bios... that reminds me, i have to update the bios... i should do that now... lol... later.

Bah

2007-03-05T19:23:00.000-08:00

I hate my computer sooooo very much.... i have changed ram and hdd.... going to try this for a while.... hopefully it'll work better... nothing else has really been happening... Later

Finally

2007-02-27T20:45:00.000-08:00

well finally I have returned. my computer was completely dead and my step father fixed it (I hope lol) so I have to do some blog updates but first I need to setup my computer the way I like it. hee hee

well..

2007-02-18T16:59:00.000-08:00

well after trolling the internet last night looking for some answers, I did not find many but I did come to a realization. If I were to take some sorta degree and it turns out that I dont enjoy the job, it wouldnt be a waste of money as I have been thinking. I can use that education towards something else and save money and time in that something else.
I also realized that even though I dont know what I wanna do for sure, I do know what I have to do... I have to get my grade 12 upgraded to an accaptable level. I have graded but all the courses I have are under almost any college degree requirements. So I have to fix that and that will give me time to decide what it is I want to do. Makes sense to me. lol
Now I just need to do it.

here I sit

2007-02-18T01:40:00.000-08:00

well I'm sitting here on my broken computer trying to figure some things out. I'm sick of just scraping by and yet, I am not sure what to do with my life. So I sit here yet again trying to figure it all out. My mom has gotten it into my head to look into becoming a vet. I think that it would be kewl as I do love animals and vets starting wage is about 40k a year which is around 800 a week (better then my 334 every 2 weeks)
But the same thoughts creep into my mind, what if I dont enjoy it and I wasted all that money on it. What if I hate it. If I do go through with it, where do I attend?
If I do go through with veterinary education, I would have to spend a year or 2 upgrading my grade 12 education, then 2-3 years doing the pre-vet education, and then another 3-4 years in Saskachewan doing the actual Vet Education.
I dont know anyone out there. I think I got some family on my dad's side but I've never met them and I know nothing bout them. Also 4 years in Saskachewan can lead to some friendships and possibly other relationships, I would then have the problem of wanting to stay there or come back to BC.
Theres things that I wanna do but so does everyone else, like computers or music. theres just to many people in those feilds, not that it cant be done. Then theres the trades, which realistically I should pursue but I dont want to. every trade I've tried I either dont enjoy or I get hurt really bad.
So yeah, I dont know what to do and I sit here yet again trying to figure it out. I envy those who know what they wanna do and they do it but I'm not them.
Anyway thats my 2 cents for tonight

GRR!!

2007-02-17T18:22:00.000-08:00

well my computer has crashed again. I am unable to get an operating system installed but i am able to use Ubuntu without installing it. problem with that is I cant make any changes to my computer. but I thought I'd let people know that my computer is down again.

From a few days ago, Memories

2007-02-14T08:41:00.000-08:00

This is actually from Monday or so. I have not posted it because I was busy and I didn't really know how to end it. any ways here it is, though I don't think it's quite finished yet. The picture is not mine, it is from a friend and is not allowed to be used without their expressed permission.

Memories

Memories of the past
are haunting and chilling
they can surface so fast
the feelings can be surprising

Common items of everyday
can suddenly become a trigger
to the thoughts of yesterday
and leave you feeling smaller or bigger

In these memories I have seen
that I have been many different things
some things good and some mean
some are a haunting and some a blessing

I've been the lost and abandoned
I've been the loved and the hated
I've been the uplifted and the saddened
I've been the hurried and the waited

I've been a son and a father
I've been alone and had a family
I've been a brother
even to those who are not brotherly

I've been honest and true
I've lied and cheated
I've been with the old and new
everyone I thought I needed

Before all this...
I was nothing
HDDL

thanx

2007-02-14T08:09:00.000-08:00

Well I'm not really sure what to say... I woke up and checked my blog comments today and found some interesting things. Thank you to those who left me encouraging comments and thank you to Wayne for what he has done. He has written about me and my blog in his blog. You can find what I'm referring to here.

I don't know how to explain it but this meant much to me and has uplifted my spirits greatly for today.
Thank you

Also, as a side note, I have found that my mom has been forced to create and update a blog for her cats. Very amusing. it can be found here and I've added a link as well

Another quick side note, today is day one of a smoke free life... wish me luck. I'll post later with an update as to how the smokeless day went

memories and heartache...

2007-02-11T09:46:00.000-08:00

Since working at superstore many memories have come back and i find it hard to believe that she's still hurting me so much after all this time. when I met her I did some bad things to others, which i'm still sorry for. but I thought she was the one and maybe thats why shes still hurting me. I should have known better (I did), I should have listened to others but it felt so right, i didn't want to listen to others about her.

She is a memory now, and a heartache, a memory that is fading (slowly but fading.) Time goes by and she dissapears more and more. but I find it odd to be back where it began at a superstore.

Anyways, to those i hurt, I'm am still very sorry. and to those I ignored, I'm sorry as well but i'll keep ignoring you. :) lol joking. and to those who are now worried about my mentality dont be i'm fine, it was just a thought

"Sometimes people want to change the past or to undo it and live a different life entirely but the past is what makes us who we are and I wouldn't change a thing"

.....

2007-02-11T08:33:00.000-08:00

Good morning people.. just sitting here with coffe having a look at what everyone is doing lately. i haven't been doing much. work is going good. I'm getting over 20 hours a week and my arm is holding out... sorta. I'm glad the pain has gone away for the most part but theres still days that get bad. ussually after doing 2 8 hours shifts in a row. oh well. my computer hasnt crashed since the last format i did but it still isnt working properly. i thought it was my video card but i found one to switch with and that doesnt seem to be the problem. I'm going to start trying different memory chips see if that helps. but other then that i have not been doing much. been watching tv thru google video but thats about it really. anyway, later

0.0

2007-02-07T23:12:00.000-08:00

i hate these nights...insomnia stinks. im tired and I have to wake up early tomorrow for work but I just cant sleep. I have been laying in bed for hours now. Anyways, haven't really been doing much lately, working, and watching online movies at google video and fighting with my computer. darn thing is coma-toast for all i care or know. anyways, I'm going to try to get some sleep otherwise I'm going to be dogging it tomorrow.

Quotes

2007-02-06T00:34:00.000-08:00

I like quotes and i like to collect them as well. i just wish I could find a good way to do so. oh well.. here works

"I've been dancing with the devil for way too long and its making me grow old" - creed

"At times life is wicked and I just cant see the light" - Creed

"The Wheel of Time turns, and ages come and pass leaving memories that become legend, then fade to myth, and are long forgotten when that age comes again." - Robert Jordan, "The Wheel of Time"

"Not all who wander are lost" - J.R.R. Tolkien

" Nothing makes us so lonely as our secrets." - Anonymous

"I am powerful, I am immortal, I can do anything, I am cursed, I am the Darkness" - Jackie Estacado.

"First defense against evil - Open your damn eyes." - Reese, Forever Knights

"The darkness that surrounds us cannot hurt us. It is the darkness in your own heart you should fear." - Silvetris

"Guys, I'm drinking Jolt. In about 3 minutes, my reaction time is going to exceed twice that of normal men. Steal another fry, I break your fingers." - Unknown

"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster...when you gaze too long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes back." - Friedrich Nietzsche

"Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most." - Unknown

"Nothing really dies as long as it's not forgotten." - Julian

"It is just Me, or are Myself and I crazy too?" - unknown

today...

2007-02-06T00:02:00.000-08:00

well today wasnt really a great day.. have been pretty down all day, even at work. worked hard but couldnt bring the happy levels up. usually i can fake through work but not today. oh well, guess we all have our off days. been getting my computer all setup properly again because it crashed and i lost EVERYTHING... :(

I wrote something today. i don't think it's that good but its at least a testament to how i was feeling today.

My Shattered World

My world is shattered
I don't know what to do
my will is tattered
and my heart is blue.
I never thought
it would be like this
I never thought
I'd live in this abyss
that has consumed me
and left me hopeless
I wish I could be free
of my lifes darkness
I've seen a lot
some good, more bad
my one thought
always try to be glad
but happiness
is fleeting
and the darkness
is always consuming
and now it gets worst
with every passing day
i feel cursed
the hounds of hell bay
and i keep running
trying to find the light
in which i could be sunning
but instead i fight
there must be hope somewhere....
HDDL

soooo.....

2007-02-05T10:33:00.000-08:00

ive setup a flickr account (mcheltman85@yahoo.com)... ive setup snap in my blog which i think is nice. been setting up my computer the way i like it... to bad it's likely to crash again at any given point. :( oh well. gotta save up for new one XD. and now im getting ready for work.should take camera with me

im here

2007-02-05T08:48:00.000-08:00

im alive. work is going ok... phone is broken... got a working loaner phone though... computer is broken.... arm is getting better but still not perfect.... stomache is grumbling but all in all im alright

blah

2007-01-24T13:10:00.000-08:00

so everything is going ok... been working and relaxing and stressing. meh oh well, things will get better... i hope. neways i dont really have much to say just passing threw all of my websites. lol

alright

2007-01-06T15:40:00.000-08:00

so i got the phone call today. i go in monday to fill in the paperwork then im officially a superstore employee making 8.45 an hour. ouch that wage is horrible. lol oh well, its a job. and my arm is finally starting to feel better after the shot. *happydance* and.... ya... thats it i got nothing else to say.

good news

2007-01-05T21:15:00.000-08:00

I dont wanna get ne1 hopes up but i had an interview with Superstore for the housewares department. sounds like they really wanna hire me. havent heard back yet tho. so im hoping.

other then that not much new is happening. so cya all soon

??

2007-01-02T06:10:00.000-08:00

Todays outing

2006-12-30T16:37:00.000-08:00

Some pics from todays outing

Moms cat baby

Moms cat bunny. She was looking at me till i clicked the camara, darn cat lol

And colby acting dumb at omas place

Wish I had been in a better mood today. everyone wanted to go to a movie and stuff but my arm is soooo sore today. I just went and got the cortozone shot for it and now it hurts even more. so ya i didnt wanna go. oh well, next time i guess

Have a goodnight all

The days after ....

2006-12-27T17:01:00.000-08:00

Christmas was good. haven't eaten that well in a while lol. got a new camara for xmas. im happy. i'll be clicky happy for a while lol. other than that not much happening...oh .... i stand corrected, my phone broke again. I just got it back from service a few days ago and its broken again. now i have to deal with telus again. i hate this contract im in.

Anywhoo, ttyl.

dont worry

2006-12-21T13:28:00.000-08:00

Dont worry all. I am ALIVE. just been trying to keep busy. been looking for work and took someones advice, found myself something fun to do. thats y i havent been round. ill try to appear more often.

Still no work. Arms still not great but not as bad i think. i think its getting better. thats about it really. Oh actually for all who care, i have quit drinking. i have not touched ne alcohol in over 2 months. im proud of myself.

now i need to work on smoking . . .

im still alive

2006-12-05T10:46:00.000-08:00

been trying to keep busy. got winxp on pc now. interview didnt go very well. lady wouldn't hire me because of my shoulder because a cashier at saveon does more heavy lifting then a stocker.

been having problems with my cell phone again. its back in the repair center. I wish I could find some one to take over my cell phone account because i dont want it anymore and telus wont let me out of it withough a 500 fee.

other then that not much has been happening. looking for work. surviving.

boredumb

2006-11-30T19:19:00.000-08:00

today is one of those days. a day where i just cant find anything interesting to do. i hate being bored. it's boring, lol.

Been working on the family research, trying to get google to recognize my website. took forever but google has finally recognized my site and has put it in their search results. happy about that but I still cant find the site by searching. lol. oh well.

speaking of which, I'm still stuck on one of my ancestors. been stuck there for a few years. my 2nd cousin twice removed, whom i talk to quite a bit, was also doing research and he was stuck on the same ancestor for 10 years! So I dont really know what to do with this ancestor of mine. I really wanna trace my family back further but, well, i can't right now. Going to try emailing a church who seems to have records that may be of use to me but well who knows.

um . . . so yeah . . . still bored. bye

???

2006-11-30T18:13:00.000-08:00

life is a funny thing. like why do sheep have bombs?

Or why would someone put a pancake on a bunny??
Well I dont have the answers but i hope you enjoy the pics. lol

SNOW

2006-11-29T20:45:00.000-08:00

its snowing again. oh well. got a phone call from save on for an interveiw for cashier. not exactly my first pick but a jobs a job i suppose. I just wish my arm would et better so i can o back to painting. I enjoyed that and the money was good.

Im really starting to consider getting the cortezone shot to fix my arm. this is supposed to go away in 1-3 months. this started in the beginning of september. getting sick of it.

Well anyway im off to check my email.

christmas tree

2006-11-27T23:20:00.000-08:00

ok so you all wanna see my xmas tree. lol here you go. it's a bad pic. i had to scan in the box picture as i dont have a camara but it works. you get the idea, tiny little tree. lol.

Anyway, had a great weekend aside from the wicked blizzard. lol. not much else to really say tho today so i'm not going to say anything. lol

OH what a day

2006-11-26T00:42:00.000-08:00

what a day. went to moms and setup the Christmas tree. then me and my bro did some shopping. then we all went to dinner in langley and it started snowing bad. Then went to see the new jame bond flick. Not bad movie but a word of advice, it's long, so sip ur drink slowly. I had to pee the ENTIRE movie. lol. And then . . more snow! got out of theatre and there was snow everywhere. The drive to abbey was slow and snowy. after dropping the bro off at moms I came home and that was quite a trip. Snow, slip, snow, slide, snow, slow, and more snow. Tho driving in that kinda of snow with a good techno song is very trippy. thought i was going insane a couple of time. Got home and setup my very first xmas tree of my own. YAY!. mom got me a tree. it's about a foot tall. lol. its great. its going to be a charlie brown xmas for me lmao.

Well anyway, it was a good day. i'd have to say i actually had fun for the first time in a very long long time. I'm off ta bed as its getting really late. night all

There is something . .

2006-11-24T18:20:00.000-08:00

theres something that i did want to post. It's a bit dark but I wanted to post it cuz it was the first poem I've written in a long time and I really like it, compared to some of my other stuff.

You And I

You are anger, I'm depression.
you are red, I'm black.
You create fear, I submission,
each our own way to attack.

Just as we have our own way
to live and survive this life
and get through each painful day
struggling through each strife.

Used to think we're alike
I see now we're very different
but we will continue to strike
at those who cause us ailment

Each in our own way
That is just us, You and I
HDDL

To those of you who don't like this, or understand it, then oh well. To 'You', I just hope you're alright and I hope to see you again soon.

Mrph

2006-11-24T17:32:00.000-08:00

Well doing a blog . . . don't know why . . . oh ya thats right, mom wanted me to. lol. anywhoo, welcome to my blog. I'm me. not much more to say. Idont know what I'll be blogin about but it'll be here and it'll be odd I'm sure.